My little wake up call

Okay, so, I've had a bit of a revelation this morning, and though I should be outlining for contracts, i just had to share...

Very recently (last few days or so) i've been feeling relatively unimpressed in a general sense. Unimpressed with myself mostly. Like I could have gotten better grades (even though I got good ones), I could have more friends, I could be more productive, could be a better wife, etc etc. And everyone around me seemed to have a better position in life than me. Essentially I had a bad case of "the grass is always greener".

So I've been selling books on half.com, just because it's easy and I get rewarded for clearing out clutter. Aa did a favor for me and mailed the most recent sales, but the amount they charged us for shipping pretty much cancelled out our profits. We're not talking a tons of money - maybe 20 bucks. Anyway, when i realized how much they charged us, I was so disappointed. I found myself saying, "$10 each to mail those books? That's insane!!". My internal level of discontent rose just a tad.

And then, on my walk to MARTA, it hit me. Or God hit me. Or something. Anyway, I started thinking about the people in Gaza right now. Politics aside, it sounds like hell on Earth. No water, no food, no medical care, homes destroyed with no such thing as reimbursement from an insurance company.

And I realized...losing profits on a half.com sale isn't insane. Standing in my warm & stable home, talking to my loving & supportive husband, getting ready to head to school with a full stomach and being upset about a stupid book sale is what's insane.

The discontent I had been carrying within myself dissolved immediately. I had been wanting to ditch that unhappiness for a while, but hadn't been successful. But when I stopped to think about how immeasurably blessed I am - everything felt better. Realizing how loved I am - it was so humbling and fulfilling. Now I feel so much better. It's so much easier to look upon other's fortune with happiness, instead of jealousy.

I know to others it's obvious how stupid it was of me to not be thankful - but it's always easier to see how other's lives are so good. We tend to think our problems are our own, and others have it easy. But it feels so much better to realize that that's not the case.
Anyway, I just wanted to share. I hope that I can keep this realization at the forefront of my mind every day. I wish we all would. Why is it so easy to take what we have for granted?

Much love,
Sara